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My past should not define my future

If you understand life as a journey from birth to maturity, you can look at your progression in life and review what you have learned.

We know that all thoughts and actions of a child are not generally appropriate as an adult. We know that our experiences have an emotional component that affects how we think and feel. Undesirable and tragic experiences have an emotional impact and imprint that can be re-experienced in the present. This emotional impact is carried into the present day regardless of the current relevance.

It can be considered as a body-mind muscle memory. This memory is reenacted anytime something similar occurs in present time. When this happens, one may react in an inappropriate manner that can create conflict and misunderstanding in relationships. It can be devastating until this driving force of one’s behavior is understood. Then one can properly deal with embedded emotions from the past. Recognizing the origins of an issue can be helpful in diluting its effects in present time.

Depression can be related to past indiscretions or things that you could have done better. Anxiety can be about what the future will be like. We tend to worry about such things as health, finances and relationships. On the other hand, new positive experiences can be uplifting and encourage ongoing learning. Peace and calm can be found in the present. Being grateful for what one has is a good place to start. It will support more of the same. Make a list of all the positive things in your life and express gratitude.

I believe that everyone is doing the best they can at their level of awareness. Abraham Maslow was known as a humanistic psychologist. He believed that everyone was born inherently good; however, when one’s path to full potential is blocked or frustrated, one can become abusive or destructive. Life is a learning process. As we begin to understand that some of our past behaviors were due to a lack of awareness, we can begin to recognize our own complicity. As we learn more and our level of awareness increases, we tend not to forgive ourselves for things that we have done in the past. This can conflict with our ability to love ourselves. If we cannot completely love ourselves, our ability to love others is impacted. Forgiving oneself for indiscretions that were driven by a lack of awareness is a good step into wholeness. Our journey through life is an educational process.

Each family has qualities that support or detract from uplifting psychological development for their children. Some children grow up with the idea they are not good enough, smart enough or athletic enough. Some families control their children with the threat or use of physical abusive. Others control children with rewards or restrictions on their activities. Some families make children feel guilty in order to have their sons and daughters comply with their rules. These parenting practices can have devastating effects on children throughout adulthood.

Understanding the dynamics of these situations can assist in properly dealing with disarming negative effects from childhood. It may not be possible to completely remove all the impact of these negative tendencies, but we can learn to live with them without negatively affecting the present. You can be grateful for your difficult experiences. They were opportunities for you to learn and grow while enriching the texture of your life. It is important to consistently evaluate what and how you are thinking about your life experiences. Change your thinking and your life will follow.

Charles “Al” Huth is an author, teacher, workshop presenter and magician. His newest book is “Recognizing Your Immense Possibilities — A Unique Approach,” infinitemagician@sbcglobal.net. Email 600- to 700-word articles on all aspects of inner peace to Sally McKirgan at innerpeaceforyou@outlook.com.

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