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Letters, Jan. 31

Anther humane society

Could it be ours?

If I feel I’ve completed my life work, made the contributions I can effectively make, am still mentally competent, struggle with a declining quality of life (possibly with a chronic, deteriorating physical condition), have my affairs in order, don’t wish to further burden my family, and don’t wish to have my limited resources used for prolonged care I have no interest in, could a peaceful, dignified death-hastening alternative be a choice even without a six-month terminal diagnosis?

Can we expand people’s life and death choices? Yours? Mine? After all, it’s my life. What about my death?

The first step is expanding our conversations about choice. One such opportunity will be held on Tuesday, Feb. 5, 1 p.m., at the Medford Library, 205 S. Central Ave., sponsored by Disabled American Veterans, Band of Brothers, and End Choices, an Oregon nonprofit corporation, www.endchoices.com.

I’m close to 80 and have given this a lot of study. I’d like to meet you Feb. 5 and share thoughts.

Pat Gordon


Neurological condition

A rumor is circulating that the CDC is investigating a new disease that seems to be spreading quickly within the federal government and is now beginning to affect state and county government bureaucracies.

The CDC estimates that 1 in 3 bureaucrats are now affected by a condition known as CFM:

Cranial Fecal Matter is a communicable neurological condition that can occur from bureaucratic constipation causing bureaucrats to become full of crap. This results in feces being pressurized into the cranium, causing neuropathy of the frontal lobes of the brain, resulting in paralysis and nothing meaningful being accomplished for the taxpayers.

The CDC is hopeful that the cure currently being tested (a swift kick in the ass) will be effective in treating the disease.

If it were only that easy?

William E. Simpson II


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