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Gardeners resolve to grow better

Shortly before Christmas, I was invited to a party attended by several other gardeners, so it was not surprising that the conversation turned to reflection on the past gardening year and plans for 2012.

I'd like to share with you some of the "resolutions" made by these gardeners. You will quickly notice that many are humorous or tongue-in-cheek, with a few serious ones thrown in for good measure.

"I resolve not to keep my yard and garden too neat, as it might be intimidating to visitors."

"I resolve to re-do my front yard. Of course, that's the same resolution I made last year. And the year before that."

"I'm going to try not to work as hard as I did this year."

"I resolve to not be out of town this year when the sweet corn ripens."

"I'm going to expand my butterfly garden."

"I resolve to have something in my garden that's nice to look at."

"I'm sharpening my tools and greasing the tractor before I want to use them."

"I'm going to plant more flowers for the deer."

"I've decided that asphalt painted green would be a good alternative to a lawn."

"Got a good recipe for wild turkey soup?"

"I resolve to get professional help to trim my wisteria. Did you know that wisteria rhymes with hysteria?"

"I resolve to listen to my wife, who says that 20 tomato plants are too many for two people."

"I'm giving a medal to my dogs, who catch ground squirrels."

"I resolve to rake my leaves before spring planting time."

"I'm going to put up a sign in my grape arbor that reads: 'Raccoons are to stay on this end of the grapes and leave the rest for us.' Hope they can read."

"I resolve to trim my perennials before they freeze and turn to mush."

"I resolve to get rid of some more lawn."

"I resolve to remember that I can outrun slugs and snails, and therefore can catch them."

"I am determined to find a way to annihilate moles and gophers in my garden."

"Is there a way to turn slugs and snails into a cash crop?"

"I resolve to remove all the dead trees from my property."

"I'm going to stay indoors when it's cold and not work in the yard."

"I'll try to remain calm when raccoons think my compost pile is there for their personal worm-dining pleasure."

"I plan to celebrate the fact that I'll be earning my 'organic certification' this year."

"I resolve to be entertained by the fiction published in seed catalogs and by tool manufacturers."

"I resolve not to work so hard at eliminating weeds. Maybe I'll just give them a Latin name and admire their robust growth."

As you can see, gardeners are a light-hearted bunch, as a rule. I invite you to make your own gardening resolutions for 2012, serious or not. After all, one of the goals of gardening is to enjoy the experience.

Happy gardening in 2012!

Carol Oneal is a past president of the OSU Jackson County Master Gardeners Association. Email her at diggit1225@gmail.com.